Toddling along
I have written and rewritten the following paragraphs approximately 5 times over the last 5 months. I"ll let you read them, unedited, in italics. I was never able to form the cohesive story I wanted to, and now there's a continuation of sorts.
This blog was titled "How to entertain a 2 year old??!!"
No, serious question, I'm asking for help! My kid is full of energy and lacking fear. It's the goddamn dead of winter in this city and there's about three hundred feet of snow outside. We have resorted to jumping on the couch as a means of entertainment but that's going to become old pretty quick. Or, she'll break her arm and that will really end the jumping. She hasn't figured out her 'J' sound yet so we're always 'bumping', all day and night. It's a good thing her bed has rails still or else she for sure would have fallen off the bed by now. To add to the jumping she has learned how to do a somersault! As a very proud mom I am always encouraging her to practice them but it's starting to backfire because she now will flip herself over the arm of the couch into a forward roll. This frequently goes sideways, literally and figuratively. Good thing I'm an expert pillow/blanket cushion maker on the floor.
We enrolled her in her first gymnastics class and as much as we thought it would wear her out, it doesn't. HAHahaa:(. Jokes on us. We have to chase her around the gym because she refuses to stay with the class and follow the instructors. She knows the facility we go to, and she's very smart, so when the opportunity arises to run away she does. There are two places in the gym with a foam pit and she beelines it for either one. Then I have to run after her and drag her back. I'm exhausted after an hours class and she could play all day. I'd love to say her being in a structured class is building her ability to listen and follow instruction; to make new friends and learn new skills. All it's really doing is making me tired and she gets stamps on her hand at the end of class. Last weeks class almost ended in us going home early. I had to take her aside and tell her that she had to listen and stay with the group or else she doesn't get her stamps. She looked at her bare hands and nodded her head. I think that she understood. She at least returned to the area where she was supposed to be but she kept butting in front of all the other kids in line. Kid. It's a work in progress.
I can not wait for spring/summer. For her birthday we got her a tricycle that we're pretty sure she'll figure out quickly, and she keeps seeing her pink car in the garage and she doesn't understand why we can't go for a walk. At this rate she's going to get a trampoline and a ball pit and a swimming pool for the backyard and by next year we'll have to buy a bigger house so we can build a rock wall and a foam pit in the basement.
The other problem with winter is that every other mom and dad are in the same boat. So when we decide to venture to an indoor playplace it is jam packed. Children run amok. Parents occupy the few tables provided and stare at their phones for hours and hours. The food is pretty terrible and very expensive. The one playground we visited grossed out M so bad we left. He took Maddy up the play structure but it smelled so bad of shitty ass that he turned them both around and we moved on. What kid is running around with a poo bum?! Probably a bunch of them actually! Barf.
But now, it's June. Spring pretty much came and went in the blink of an eye. I am wrapping my head around planning mini vacations, the planning of day trips to Drumheller and the Stampede adventures that are all upon us. And in the blink of an eye no less. When I first started writing this it was January, and we were stir crazy. Now it's go go go, do this thing, go to this place. I now live for summer (even more than I did pre-baby) because it means that we can do so many more things. We will go to a different neighbourhood park; go to the Zoo, play in the backyard pizza pool. The worry now, has changed. I no longer worry about what to do, but more that we don't have enough time in a day to do it all. I work, and in retail no less, so I miss a number of bedtimes. I miss Sundays. I have to keep her out of daycare for a day if I just want to have a mommy-daughter day.
I had a moment when we were away on vacation where I told M that I feel like I'm not present. I'm there, I'm doing the activity but I'm distracted. I'm thinking about work, or what I have to do around the house, or who knows what. Nothing of significance and it makes me sad, because I feel like I'm missing out. And in that short week we were gone, and since we've been home, she grew up. We got all the updates from Gamma, we facetimed everyday, but there's something about seeing your kid after you've been away. I don't think I notice it on a day to day basis. But a week away? She must have aged 6 months in just that time.
The worry has changed.
She said her first F word while we were gone, she stepped on a Lego. Said fuck out loud and Gamma asked "where did you hear that word?" She said "Daddy". Phew😜. She put all her bath toys away once the water was drained. She sat comfortably in my lap at her first dentist appointment and she opened up wide for him to check her teeth. She now kisses me good night after I turn off her light, and proceeds to push me out of the room, shutting the door in my face. She climbs straight into bed and pulls up her own blankets. She dropped her bedtime bottle the first night that we tried and we never looked back.
We get in the car now and as soon as we start moving she yells at us "Mommy buckle up seatbelt". Kid, I was reaching for it, you didn't even give me a chance! LOL. She can tell me what she had for lunch at daycare. But, to be fair, three days in a row last week she said they had soup. I never confirmed that with our provider, but I feel like that may not be true. We introduced the toddler bed back on her second birthday but we're realizing she needs a bigger bed. For her to stretch out and for us to lay with her. It was hard for me walking through IKEA this morning looking at twin size beds and dressers. Planning out a room overhaul and talking to M about getting rid of every baby toy in the house. She plays with 16% of the toys she owns, let's pack the rest away in case theres's another minion. We have a reading nook; she can brush her own teeth (kind of); potty training is next on the radar. She yells at the dog to go to his kennel if he's being bad. And she's learned to ride her tricycle, something that makes Daddy so very proud.
The worry has changed. From worry to wonder. We wonder what the fuck she's saying most the time. She has her own little toddler language that she talks to herself, or to us sometimes. If any of you reading this can tell me what "dahman" means, please fill me in. No one knows, but man, she says it all the time. A series of sing-song noises and learning the words to Wheels on the Bus. However if you are her parent and try to help her sing she will yell at you "NO MAMA". That's my cue to shut up I suppose. She may have learned a little road rage from one of us. At a red light she screams "GO!!!" at the cars in front. We have to explain that 'red light stop' and 'green light go' is a thing, and now she' looks at the light first before yelling at traffic. At least she's in the right context now. I wonder what she dreams of at night. I wonder 38 times a day what she's asking me for/pointing at. I wonder if she likes the food we cook for her, if she's happy, if she sleeps well. And when she opens her bedroom door at 730 in the morning, hair standing on end, rubbing her sleepy eyes, I stop worrying. She climbs into bed with me and smiles. She asks me where is Daddy and I tell her at work. She repeats those words and nods her head. She approves of this. And she pulls the covers up over our heads and says "hide! hide! hide!"
I don't need to entertain her anymore. She can do that by herself now, between her puzzles, her cat, her tricycle. She's growing up so fast it scares me, but I've never been more proud of her.
But now, it's June. Spring pretty much came and went in the blink of an eye. I am wrapping my head around planning mini vacations, the planning of day trips to Drumheller and the Stampede adventures that are all upon us. And in the blink of an eye no less. When I first started writing this it was January, and we were stir crazy. Now it's go go go, do this thing, go to this place. I now live for summer (even more than I did pre-baby) because it means that we can do so many more things. We will go to a different neighbourhood park; go to the Zoo, play in the backyard pizza pool. The worry now, has changed. I no longer worry about what to do, but more that we don't have enough time in a day to do it all. I work, and in retail no less, so I miss a number of bedtimes. I miss Sundays. I have to keep her out of daycare for a day if I just want to have a mommy-daughter day.
I had a moment when we were away on vacation where I told M that I feel like I'm not present. I'm there, I'm doing the activity but I'm distracted. I'm thinking about work, or what I have to do around the house, or who knows what. Nothing of significance and it makes me sad, because I feel like I'm missing out. And in that short week we were gone, and since we've been home, she grew up. We got all the updates from Gamma, we facetimed everyday, but there's something about seeing your kid after you've been away. I don't think I notice it on a day to day basis. But a week away? She must have aged 6 months in just that time.
The worry has changed.
She said her first F word while we were gone, she stepped on a Lego. Said fuck out loud and Gamma asked "where did you hear that word?" She said "Daddy". Phew😜. She put all her bath toys away once the water was drained. She sat comfortably in my lap at her first dentist appointment and she opened up wide for him to check her teeth. She now kisses me good night after I turn off her light, and proceeds to push me out of the room, shutting the door in my face. She climbs straight into bed and pulls up her own blankets. She dropped her bedtime bottle the first night that we tried and we never looked back.
We get in the car now and as soon as we start moving she yells at us "Mommy buckle up seatbelt". Kid, I was reaching for it, you didn't even give me a chance! LOL. She can tell me what she had for lunch at daycare. But, to be fair, three days in a row last week she said they had soup. I never confirmed that with our provider, but I feel like that may not be true. We introduced the toddler bed back on her second birthday but we're realizing she needs a bigger bed. For her to stretch out and for us to lay with her. It was hard for me walking through IKEA this morning looking at twin size beds and dressers. Planning out a room overhaul and talking to M about getting rid of every baby toy in the house. She plays with 16% of the toys she owns, let's pack the rest away in case theres's another minion. We have a reading nook; she can brush her own teeth (kind of); potty training is next on the radar. She yells at the dog to go to his kennel if he's being bad. And she's learned to ride her tricycle, something that makes Daddy so very proud.
The worry has changed. From worry to wonder. We wonder what the fuck she's saying most the time. She has her own little toddler language that she talks to herself, or to us sometimes. If any of you reading this can tell me what "dahman" means, please fill me in. No one knows, but man, she says it all the time. A series of sing-song noises and learning the words to Wheels on the Bus. However if you are her parent and try to help her sing she will yell at you "NO MAMA". That's my cue to shut up I suppose. She may have learned a little road rage from one of us. At a red light she screams "GO!!!" at the cars in front. We have to explain that 'red light stop' and 'green light go' is a thing, and now she' looks at the light first before yelling at traffic. At least she's in the right context now. I wonder what she dreams of at night. I wonder 38 times a day what she's asking me for/pointing at. I wonder if she likes the food we cook for her, if she's happy, if she sleeps well. And when she opens her bedroom door at 730 in the morning, hair standing on end, rubbing her sleepy eyes, I stop worrying. She climbs into bed with me and smiles. She asks me where is Daddy and I tell her at work. She repeats those words and nods her head. She approves of this. And she pulls the covers up over our heads and says "hide! hide! hide!"
I don't need to entertain her anymore. She can do that by herself now, between her puzzles, her cat, her tricycle. She's growing up so fast it scares me, but I've never been more proud of her.
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